Getting Inspired, Energized and Empowered

Recently I attended a women’s empowerment seminar, “Sisters Take Charge!” I originally signed up for the event to hear handsome author and former radio host Michael Baisden, but I got more than I bargained for. I was inspired by all of the presenters—local doctors, business leaders, a minister and an educator—but three speakers really resonated with me.

Dr. Peola Dews Jackson, a local educator and motivational speaker, emphasized the importance of acceptance, improvement and the Law of Attraction. She had three powerful messages:
• Acceptance: Love yourself the way you are.
• Improvement: Keep growing and trying to improve yourself. “You are good, but you can be damn good if you want to be,” she said.
• Attraction: When you feel good about yourself, you will attract the people in your life that you need.

Michelle Tatom, director of Small Business Development for the Greater Orlando Aviation Authority, talked about three prerequisites for success. She urged us to:
• Forgive: Don’t carry the extra baggage of hurt and anger. Forgive the people who have hurt you and move on with your life.
• Believe in Yourself: You have to feel that you deserve success. Appreciate your good qualities and know that you are worthy of the best.
• Be Fearless: Don’t let fear hold you back from trying something new. “Fear is just False Evidence Appearing Real,” she reminded us.

And Michael Baisden gave us some valuable tips for building healthy relationships. He told us to create a new role model for successful relationships based on honesty, realistic expectations and good communication. He said women should keep our standards high and challenge our partners to meet our high expectations.

Yes, sometimes it’s worth spending time on a Saturday getting inspired, energized and empowered!

Happy Father's Day!

   Deadbeat dad, absentee father, emotionally distant parent. Some folks can describe their father with those adjectives. Thank God, my father doesn't fit that mold. For James Cleveland Gist Jr, his mantra is, "family first". As a child, I always knew who to ask for an expensive toy or an unnecessary piece of clothing. I'd make a beeline to good ole dad. And his answer was predictable: "Just tell me what you want and I'll get it for you, Roz". He loved spoiling his three children and giving in to our every whim.

   My dad will celebrate his 93rd birthday in September and he has a lot to be proud of. He's the oldest of 10 children, he served in World War II and used the GI bill (an educational subsidy for military veterans) to earn a masters degree from Columbia University in the 1940s. He taught at Southern University in Baton Rouge, LA for more than 40 years and wrote a earth science textbook, which he taught from in the 1990s.

  

   Jimmy (as my mother calls him) is a gentleman with a great sense of humor and a phenomenal capacity to teach tough subjects (like chemistry and physics) and explain them in a way that any college student could grasp. He brought science alive for his students by showing them how it is everywhere and part of everything we do. He even got me to learn about geology as a child, by buying me a toy rock collection. He lured his students in with his friendly personality and got them to understand physics--a subject most college kids try to avoid.

   Even today, you never see my dad without a book in his hand and a smile on his face. Before there was a Weather Channel on television, he was fascinated by tornadoes, hurricanes and the power of nature. Thanks to my mom (pictured with my dad at their 60th wedding anniversary in 2010) I have an appreciation for the arts (music, drama, dance, etc.). And I have to thank my dad for making me fall in love with books that tell great stories. He introduced me to poetry and the art of storytelling.

   To say my dad has the gift of gab is an understatement. He loves to talk--non-stop--and paint memorable verbal portaits of people, places and things. When he rears back in his chair and starts teaching, you're going to hear a long, life lesson. Daddy never gives you the short explanation or a quick story. When he starts talking, you'll be there for a while. I have learned to relax and enjoy this master talker work his magic.

   On Father's Day, Daddy, I want to thank you for being a great role model of how to live a life filled with gratitude, compassion, patience and empathy! Thank God (and mom), you're my dad! Happy Father's Day!  

Expanding My Culinary Comfort Zone

When the chief cook in your household is a vegan (eats no meat, dairy…nothing from an animal) your culinary horizon automatically gets lifted higher and higher. Since 2004, my daughter has been a dedicated vegan and I have been enjoying the delicious meals she prepares for dinner.

 

To say she has expanded my culinary comfort zone is an understatement. When I was the top chef in the house, I had a tight rotation of chicken, fish and ground beef meals every week. Thanks to my daughter, Kai, and TV cardiologist, Dr. Oz, I now prefer quinoa (instead of rice), kale (instead of lettuce) and veggie burgers over a ground beef hamburger. 

 

Although I dabbled in vegetarianism in college, I never had the stomach or desire to go all the way vegan. I’m still not a vegan, but I embrace their vegetable-rich diet. When Kai whips up a plate of balsamic Portobello mushrooms over a bed of spinach with a side of roasted potatoes (see the photo), I’m the first one heading back to the stove for seconds!

 

I’m not a foodie, but I am enjoying this ride on the vegan side of the food spectrum. Guys and girls, you really haven’t lived until you’ve chowed down on lentil-quinoa pilaf over arugula (my Memorial Day dinner). I’m not braggin’ but my daughter can make butternut squash and chickpeas taste finger-licking good.

 

If you’ve never had a meatless meal, don’t knock it until you’ve tried a dish at Ethos Vegan Kitchen in Winter Park, FL or the Loving Hut in Orlando. A great vegan meal can fill you up and make you think about taking the plunge into veganism. I still occasionally eat animal fare—chicken, fish and cheese—but I love a steaming hot pot of red beans and quinoa with kale!

A Passion for Cookies

I have a passion for eating cookies. So it’s not a big surprise that I found myself at DessertFest, a recent Saturday afternoon gathering featuring cookies, cupcakes, frozen treats and live music.

I came to this dessert party for delicious HeartSong Cookies and I also found myself enjoying a great local band, Chevy Van Gogh. They belted out original ballads and traditional Rock standards with a smooth Southern sound. The band added a great soundtrack to DessertFest, but Kathy’s cookies were the star of the show.

Kathy (founder of HeartSong Cookies) works a full-time job, but still finds time to bake cookies on nights and weekends. She hand makes each cookie with fresh ingredients for the love of dough…cookie dough.

Kathy’s known for three things--her big smile, her warm hugs and her melt-in-your-mouth sweet cookies. You really can’t eat just one HeartSong cookie! It’s clear that Kathy is passionate about creating distinctive cookies that leave a smile on your face and a song in your heart.

In his new book, “Life Code,” television psychologist Dr. Phil McGraw talks about how to be the star of your life. Dr. Phil says a star is someone who is doing something they’re passionate about, something that makes them light up and nurtures them (mind, body and spirit).

Yes, it only takes one bite of a HeartSong cookie to know that Kathy has found the key to Dr. Phil’s “Life Code” (rules for winning in the real world). She’s passionate about baking cookies, creating each chewy treat lights up her life, and her cookies nurture your mind, body and spirit. If you want to enjoy a HeartSong Cookie, look for Kathy’s Moo Truck at the Maitland Farmers Market. I have a soft spot in my heart for cookies, but I think there’s a cookie monster lurking in all of us!

Teaching Me More Than Music

Growing up in New Haven, CT during the 1920s my mother had only one dream. She always wanted to be a teacher. She can still remember gathering her four best friends in the back yard to play school. Little Helen was always the teacher. And her dream came true. She was the first member of her family to graduate from college and earn a master’s degree.

For more than 50 years children came to our home in Baton Rouge, LA to take piano lessons from her. And she taught hundreds of college students how to be teachers as a music education professor at Southern University from 1960 to 1995. Yes, my mother lived her childhood dream in the classroom, at her living room piano and as a role model for her three children.

 She taught me, my brother and my sister lessons every day. If my mother had a lifeclass on the Oprah Winfrey Network viewers would learn these five lessons:

·         HONESTY – Always tell the truth. Helen Morton Gist is brutally honest. She never shies away from telling it like it is.

·         FAITH – If you want something bad enough, you can find a way to make it happen.

·         PROFESSIONALISM – Keep your professional skills up-to-date.

·         CARING – Take care of friends and family (your children, nieces, nephews, cousins). She never forgets them on birthdays, holidays, graduations and always.

·         SERVICE – As one of the first Head Start teachers in the state of Louisiana in the 1960s, she is a living example of the importance of community service. In 2006, the Southern University chapter of the Professional Association for Educators gave her a “Service to Education” award for using music as an educational tool to help children displaced by Hurricane Katrina.

My mother is known for being direct, no-nonsense and hard-working. Although her communications style is more like Iyanla Vanzant than Oprah Winfrey, she shares Oprah’s love of education. It’s part of her DNA and mine. Thank you, mom, for always teaching me more than music.

Happy Mother’s Day!

Speaking of Youth...

I’ve evaluated many speeches in my 10 years as a member of Toastmasters International, but few speakers have taught me as many lessons as the 10 elementary and middle school students I judged last month in the Orange County 4-H Tropicana Public Speaking Contest.

The fresh-faced fourth, fifth and sixth graders—three boys and seven girls—spoke on a wide range of topics, from war and peace to basketball and Australia. Connor explained what it’s like to be a twin, Taylor revealed how it feels to be the natural-born child in a family who cares for foster children and Marisol shared the joys of being a hearing child with deaf parents.

The teachers, family members and volunteers in the audience were impressed. They laughed, were in awe and were proud of the youth who gave voice to their hopes, dreams and family values. As one of the contest judges, I evaluated each speaker on their use of language, speech delivery and choice of topic. In turn, each speaker gave me a pearl of their wisdom.

Brooke Sheaf, who won the middle school contest, delivered one of the most powerful messages—the best way to overcome your fear is to jump in with both feet! Brooke overcame her fear of swimming by jumping into the deep end of the pool. What’s your biggest fear?

Fight Your Fear of Public Speaking

During the 10 years I have been a member of Toastmasters International, I have given many speeches and won a few public speaking awards. I have made presentations at work, appeared on radio and TV talk shows, and coached new speakers through their first few speeches. And I still have to calm my nerves before a speech.

If you sweat like a pig, have butterflies in your stomach and your hands just can’t stop shaking before your presentation, you are not alone. But don’t worry. There are a few things you can do to calm your nerves and ease your fears.

If you have to talk before strangers as a job seeker, committee head at work or community leader, put your listeners first. Instead of thinking about how you feel, focus on how you want your audience to feel at the end of your talk. As a speaker, your only goal is to effectively communicate your message (hire me, accept my committee’s findings, or listen to what my neighborhood wants).

The next time you have to talk to one or more strangers as a speaker, use some of these tips to beat back your fear of public speaking:

1. Memorize your opening and closing lines. If you’re comfortable with how you want to open your talk and how you want to drive home your message in the end, you can focus on your delivery. Connect with your listeners with good eye contact and have a few memorable lines.
2. Make your goal your priority. Keep your eye on the ball, the goal you want to achieve. Make sure your desire to get hired, to win over your audience or explain your point of view is stronger than your fear of failure.
3. Visualize success. Before you enter the room, think about something that makes you feel relaxed and repeat a favorite phrase that pumps you up and makes you feel powerful. Imagine that you’ll have a successful speaking experience.
4. Use your nervous energy to your advantage. Show enthusiasm and energy, instead of fear. To keep your nervous energy in check, inhale deeply and exhale slowly before you begin talking. Try pressing the fingertips of one hand against the fingertips of your other hand, to disperse your nervous energy.
5. Personalize your message. Think of your presentation as a conversation where you are doing most of the talking. Personalize your language. Use the word “you” or the names of people in the audience. If you focus on your audience, not on your nerves, you can be calm, confident and courageous as you communicate your message fearlessly!